Hercules (Disney live action remake)

Hercules (2020 film) is a live-action remake of the famous 1997 Disney film.
Hercules: Demigod son of Zeus and Hera who was kidnapped and turned into mortal as a infant by his evil uncle Hades.

Megara "Meg": A warrior princess, former agent of Hades and love interest of Hercules.

Iolaus: An former thief and best friend of Hercules since their teenage year.

Pigasos: Pet Pegasus horse of Hercules, created as a newborn colt by Zeus as a gift for baby Hercules out of clouds, Pigasos will be CGI.

Eartha: Megara's horse and transportation steed, and Pigasos' love interest.

Zeus: Biological father of Hercules and rival brother of Hades.

Hera: Sister/wife of Zeus and biological mother of Hercules.

Poseidon: God of the sea and Zeus' other brother.

Olympian Gods: Children of Zeus and biological siblings of Hercules.

The Muses: (Calliope, Melpomene, Terpsichore, Thalia and Clio) Goddesses of the arts and musics and five of Zeus' offspring.

Hades: God of the underworld and lord of the dead, evil brother of Zeus and nemesis/uncle of Hercules.

Ponos and Panikos: Shape-shifting loyal demon henchmen of Hades, who always afraid of their superior. Ponos is the demon of hard labour and painful toil and Panikos is the demon of sudden fear and paranoid, Ponos and Panikos will be CGI.

The Fates (Clotho, Lachesis and Atropos) Are three wraiths who see the future and decide how long mortals live. They share a single eye among them (a trait from another mythological trio, the Graeae). They predict Hades' failed attempt to conquer Mount Olympus.

Greek creatures for Hercules' twelve labours:
 * 1) Nessus the Centaur
 * 2) Lernaean Hydra
 * 3) Erymanthian Boar
 * 4) Nemean Lion
 * 5) Harpy
 * 6) Ceto the sea serpent
 * 7) Minotaur
 * 8) Black griffin
 * 9) Gorgon (with snake tail instead of legs)
 * 10) Cyclops
 * 11) The Elemental Titans: Lythos, Hydros, Pyros and Stratos.
 * 12) Cerberus

The Events are different from the animated original film:

 * Zeus creates baby Pigasos out of clouds then gives him life while using "How to Make a Pet" book.
 * The Muses are presence when Hades departs from Zeus' celebration.
 * Hades shares the same appearance with his other counterpart from Descendants 3 who is portrayed by Cheyenne Jackson.
 * Ponos (Pain) and Panikos (Panic) are human-size demons with huge bat-like wings on their backs, Pain and Panic were renamed Ponos and Panikos, they are amalgam the original Pain and Panic and 2010 Hades' demons from Clash of the Titans. They first appear in their gargoyle statue forms when Hades summons them they morph to their true forms. They desire to get a promotion from Hades.
 * The Fates are pale skinned old women with exposed eye-socket, sharing each other with their magic eye. They are amalgam of their original counterparts from the 1997 film and the Stygian Witches from 2010 Clash of the Titans.
 * Hades is present to personally watch his nephew's mortalization before he, Ponos and Panikos are interrupted by a mortal couple, after Hercules' adoption Hades is furious at Ponos and Panikos for their failure, they ask him for another mortality potion and let them redeem themselves, but that was the only potion he got. Ponos convinces Hades to let Hercules live in a mortal life, saying "IF he'll know his father is Zeus" but just in case, they gather various Greek monsters to eliminate Hercules.
 * The Muses are presence at Zeus and Hera's sad moment for their mortalized son.
 * After teen Herc finally knows who and what he is and first met a teenage thief named Iolaus then became friends. Iolaus did not believe Herc that Zeus is his father until he is struck by lightning and is convinced.
 * Pigasos has white body with blue mane, tail and wings.
 * Hercules, Iolaus and Pigasos encounter the princess of warrior, Megara who was fighting Nessus.
 * Megara's fighting skill and combat armour inspired Xena. Her favourite weapon is Chakram. Megara "Meg" is a amalgam of the 1997 original Megara and Xena the warrior princess, who she shares the same name with Megara of the Amazons and Xena's exact look-a-like, Meg.
 * Meg's horse, Eartha is similar to Argo, Xena's horse.
 * Hades angrily learns from Meg about Hercules and finds out that Hercules knows Zeus is his father.
 * After the Hydra's first decapitation it grew two new heads.
 * The Muses are presence after Hercules' victory over Hydra.
 * Hades orders a pizza and sees Hercules' picture printed on the pizza box and burst in anger with Ponos and Panikos scorched.
 * When Hades finds out that Hercules has strongly fallen in love with Megara and restrained her in chains.
 * Lythos the two headed Rock Titan has four arms.
 * Hydros and Pyros are female named.
 * The Cyclops is not a fifth or sixth counting Lythos' two heads, but is the last monster selected and sent by Ponos & Panikos on Hades' behalf to eliminate Hercules.
 * Zeus wears a armour like the one from 2010 CotT.
 * Meg, Iolaus and Pigasos arrive to help Herc while Megara fights off the Cyclops.
 * Megara sacrifices herself to push Hercules out of the way of the fall of a collapsing column as Herc and Iolaus try to lift it, then Hercules to regain his strength because Hades' end of the bargain is now broken as he promised that Meg wouldn't get hurt.
 * Hercules travels to the Underworld to rescue Meg's soul, he enter Hades' throne chamber holding Ponos and Panikos, demanding Meg's soul.
 * After Hercules angrily punches Hades into the River Styx, where he is swarmed by vengeful souls as he screams "No! Let me out!" and dragged to the depths, much to Ponos and Panikos' delight of their master being trapped.
 * During the end credit in 'A Star is Born' Herc and Meg settle wearing Greek normal clothes. Ponos and Panikos are last seen standing in the autograph line where Herc is signing, showing their gratitude to Hercules for freeing them from Hades' servitude.

Plot
In Ancient Greece, after imprisoning the Titans beneath the ocean, the rulers of the Greek gods, Zeus and his wife Hera, have a son named Hercules on Mount Olympus. While the other gods are joyful, Zeus' jealous brother Hades plots to overthrow Zeus and rule Olympus. Turning to the Fates for help, Hades learns that in eighteen years, a planetary alignment will allow him to locate and free the Titans to conquer Olympus, but only if his nephew does not interfere. Hades sends his minions Ponos and Panikos to dispose of Hercules. The two succeed at kidnapping the infant and feeding him a formula that turns him mortal as Hades personally watches, but they fail to remove his superhuman strength before Hercules is found and adopted by the farmers Amphitryon and Alcmene, Hades is furious at them but Ponos and Panikos suggest they could gather various Greek monsters to eliminate Hercules just in case if he know who and what he is.

Years later, the teenage Hercules becomes an outcast due to his strength, and wonders where he came from. After his foster parents reveal the necklace they found him with, Hercules decides to visit the temple of Zeus for answers. The temple's statue of Zeus comes to life and reveals all to Hercules, telling him that he can regain his godhood by becoming a true hero. Zeus sends Hercules and his forgotten infant friend Pigasos to do twelve labours, at the bar Hercules and Pigasos meet a young thief named Iolaus and then they became friends and then the trio headed towards Thebes. On the way, they meet Megara—"Meg" for short—a sarcastic warrior princess and her horse Eartha whom Hercules saves from the centaur Nessus. After Hercules and the others leave, Meg is revealed to be Hades' minion, who sold her soul to him to save an unfaithful lover.

Arriving in Thebes, Hercules is turned down by the downtrodden citizens until Meg appears, saying that two boys have become trapped in a gorge. Hercules saves them, unaware that they are Ponos and Panikos in disguise, and unwittingly releases the Hydra. Hercules defeats it and becomes a celebrated hero, but despite Hercules' growing fame and defeating every subsequent monster Hades unleashes, Zeus tells him he is not yet a "true" hero. Saddened and frustrated, Hercules spends a day out with Meg, who falls in love with him. Hades learns of this and on the eve of his takeover, he holds Meg hostage and offers her in exchange for Hercules surrendering his powers for a day. On the condition that Meg will be unharmed, he accepts, and is heartbroken when Hades reveals that Meg was working for him.

Hades unleashes the Titans, who climb Olympus and capture the gods, while Ponos and Panikos sent a Cyclops goes to Thebes to kill Hercules. Hercules defeats the cyclops; Meg then saves him from a falling pillar and is mortally injured. This breaks Hades' promise that Meg would not be harmed, and allows Hercules to regain his strength. Hercules and Pigasos fly to Olympus where they free the gods and destroyed the Titans, but Meg dies before he returns to her.

With Meg's soul now Hades' property, Hercules breaks into the Underworld and offers to free Meg from the Styx in exchange for his own life. His willingness to sacrifice himself restores his godhood/immortality before the life-draining river can kill him; he rescues Meg and punches Hades into the Styx, where irate souls pull him under as Ponos and Panikos are delighted. After reviving Meg, she and Hercules are summoned to Olympus, where Zeus and Hera welcome their son home. However, Hercules chooses to remain on Earth with Meg in lieu of living on Olympus. Hercules and his friends return to Thebes, where they watch Zeus etch Hercules' image into the stars to commemorate his heroism.

Cast
Hercules - Chris Pratt

Philocetes - Danny Devito

Megara - Emma Stone

Iolaus - Nick Adams

Hades - Willem Dafoe

Zeus - Nick Offerman

Hera - Lucy Lawless

The Muses - Octavia Spencer, Alicia Keys, Beyoncé, Tiffany Haddish, & Janelle Monáe

The Fates - Julianne Moore, Michelle Pfeiffer and Amanda Plummer

Hermes - Ryan Gosling

Ponos - Jordan Peele

Panikos - Keegan-Michael Key

Amphitryon - Dick Van Dyke

Alcmene - Julie Andrews

The quotes are different from the animated original film:
Zeus: Oh. [to his siblings and children] On behalf of my son, I want to thank you all for your wonderful gifts!

-

Zeus: [after Zeus creates baby Pigasos] His name is Pigasos, and he's all yours, son.

-

Zeus: So, brother Hades, you finally made it. How are things in the underworld?

Hades: Well, they're just fine. You know, a little dark, a little gloomy. And, as always, hey, full of dead people. What are you gonna do?

-

Zeus: Come on, Hades. Don't be such a stiff. Join the celebration!

Hades: Hey. [Chuckles] Love to, babe, but unlike you gods lounging about up here, I regrettably have a full-time gig, that you, by the way, so charitably bestowed on me, Zeus. So, can't. Love to, but can't.

Zeus: You ought to slow down. You'll work yourself to death. Hah! Work yourself to death! [Laughing]

[Gods laughing]

Apollo: Good one, dad.

Zeus: Oh, I'll kill myself!

Hades: [fake Laugh] If only. If only.

Calliope: If there's one god you don't want to get steamed up, it's Hades. 'Cause he had an evil plan.

-

Hades: Ponos! Panikos! [two gargoyle statues change into demons then fly down and approach to Hades]

Ponos: Coming, your most lugubriousness. [kneels to Hades] Ponos!

Panikos: And Panikos!

Both: Reporting for duty!

Hades: Fine, fine, fine. Just let me know the instant the Fates arrive.

Panikos: Oh. They're here, my lord.

Hades: What? The Fates are here, and you didn't tell me sooner?

[both Whimpering, Groaning]

Ponos and Panikos: We are worms! [bowing and morph into worms] Worthless worms!

Hades: Memo to me, memo to me. Maim you after my meeting.

-

Hades: Ladies! Hah! I'm so sorry that I'm...

Together: Lates!

Lachesis: We knew you would be.

Clotho: We know everything about.

Lachesis: Past. Clotho: Present.

Atropos: And Future. [to Panikos] Indoor plumbing, it's gonna be big.

Hades: Great, great. Anyway, see, ladies, I was at this party, and I lost track of...

Together: We know why you're late!

Hades: Yeah. I know, you know. So here's the deal: My brother, Zeus, Mr. High And Mighty, Mr. "Hey, You, Get Off Of My Cloud", now he has...

Together: A bouncing baby brat.

Clotho: We know why you come to Olympus for!

Hades: I know, you know. I know. I got it. I got the concept. So let me just ask: Is this kid gonna mess up my hostile takeover bid, or what? What do you think?

-

Clotho: In 18 years precisely, the planets will align ever so nicely.

Panikos: Verse. Oy.

Lachesis: The time to act will be at hand. Unleash the Titans, your monstrous band.

Hades: Mm-hmm. Good, good.

Lachesis: Then the once-proud Zeus will finally fall, and you, Hades, will rule all!

[Ponos and Panikos cheered]

Hades: Yes! Hades rules!

Atropos: A word of caution to this tale.

Hades: Excuse me.

Arropos: Should Hercules fight, you will fail.

[Fates teleport, cackling]

Panikos: Three, two, one.

Hades: [bursting into flames] WHAAAT?! [cooling down] Okay, fine, fine. I'm cool. I'm fine. [On the bridge] Ponos? Panikos? Got a riddle for ya.

Ponos: A riddle for us? Ask away.

Hades: How do you kill a god?

Ponos: I do... not know, my liege.

Panikos: You can't. Because they're immortal?

Hades: Bingo! They're immortal. So, first you got to turn the little sunspot nephew of mine mortal.

-

Panikos: Now we did it! Zeus is gonna use us for target practice when he catches us!

Ponos: You mean, if he catches us.

Panikos: Of course if he's gonna c- If. If is good.

Ponos: Just hang onto the kid, Panikos, we're nearly there and Hades' here waiting for us.

Panikos: Here's the kid like you ask.

Hades: Excellent, now you know what to do. [gives Ponos a vial of mortal potion]

Panikos: Hurry! Let's just kill the kid and get over with, okay?

Ponos: [opening the vial] Here you go, kid. A little Grecian formula. [he put the vial to Baby Herc's mouth and he stops glowing as he drinks the potion]

Panikos: Look at his feet! It's working! He's changing. Can we do it now?

Hades: No, he must drink the whole potion.

Ponos: Every last drop.

Amphitryon: Who's there?

[Ponos and Panikos drop the empty vial. It breaks and one last drop falls into the ground]

Hades: Quick hide! [Hades, Ponos and Panikos hide behind the bushes]

Amphitryon: Alcmene, over here.

Baby Herc: [crying]

Alcmene: Oh, you poor thing. Oh, don't cry.

Amphitryon: Is anybody there?

Panikos: Now?

Hades: Now. [Ponos and Panikos morph into snakes] Goodbye, nephew.

Amphitryon: Oh. Well, he must have been abandoned.

Alcmene: Amphitryon, for so many years, we've prayed to the gods to bless us with a child. Perhaps they've answered our prayers.

Amphitryon: Perhaps they have. "Hercules"? [Ponos and Panikos as snakes, attack, but Baby Hercules catches them, and giggling happily, hits them several times against the ground, ties into a knot and throws far away into the sky. Amphitryon and Alcmene stare with they jaws dropped, Ponos and Panikos landed back to the ground and turn to their normal forms]

Hades: He didn't drink the last drop?!

Panikos: So this means no promotion for us? [Hades grabs Ponos and Panikos by the necks] Take that as a no.

Hades: You blew it!

Ponos: It's wasn't our fault! Those two mortals just showed up. Give us another potion and we'll redeem ourselves.

Hades: [drops Ponos and Panikos] That was the only potion I got left.

Panikos: Maybe we had to gather most worst monsters in Greece to kill Hercules, when he finds out who he is.

Ponos: IF he finds out who he is.

-

Zeus: My boy. My little Hercules.

Young Hercules: Ahhhh! [runs away]

Zeus: [blocks the exit with his statue hand] Hey. Hold on, kiddo! What's your hurry? After all these years, is this the kind of hello you give your father?

Young Hercules: F-Father?

Zeus: You didn't know that your real father is a famous god, did you? Surprise! Look how you've grown. Why, you've got your mother's beautiful eyes, and my strong chin. Hah!

Young Hercules: I-I don't understand. If you're my father, that would make me a...

Zeus: A god.

Young Hercules: A god. A god!

Zeus: Hey, you wanted answers, and by thunder, you're old enough now to know the truth. Young Hercules: But why did you leave me on Earth? Didn't you want me?

Zeus: Of course we did. Your mother and I loved you with all our hearts, but someone stole you from us and turned you mortal, and only gods can live on Mount Olympus.

Young Hercules: And you can't do a thing?

Zeus: I can't, Hercules, but you can.

Young Hercules: R-Really? W-What? I'll do anything.

Zeus: Hercules, if you can prove yourself a true hero on earth, your godhood will be restored!

Young Hercules: A true hero. Great! Uh, exactly how do you become a true hero?

-

Zeus: Whoa! Hold your horses! Which reminds me. [whistles and Pigasos appears] Ha-ha! You probably don't remember Pigasos, but you two go way back, son. [Pigasos headbutts Herc]

Young Hercules: [groans, laughs] Oh, Pigasos!

Zeus: He's a magnificent Pegasus horse with the brain of a bird.

Pigasos: [whistling] Huh?

Young Hercules: I'll become a true hero.

Zeus: That's the spirit!

Young Hercules: I won't let you down, Father! Yee-hah!

Zeus: Good luck, son.

-

Young Iolaus: Hold it! Zeus is your father, right? Zeus. The big guy. He's your daddy. [laughing] Mr. Lightning Bolts! Read me a book, would ya, Da-da? [laughing] Zeus! [mimics Zeus] "Once upon a time--"

Young Hercules: It's the truth!

Young Iolaus: Please! Where's your prove? [lightning hits Iolaus by the butt] Okay, I'm convinced.

-

[hearing a woman screaming]

Iolaus: Sounds liks your basic DID

Hercules: DID?

Iolaus: D.I.D.: Short for damsel in distress.

-

Hercules: Are you, uh, all right, Miss, uh--

Meg: It's Megara. But my friends call me Meg for short. At least, they would if I had any friends.

-

Meg: Don't worry. Blondy here can explain it to ya later.

-

Meg: [gasps] Aw, how cute. A couple of rodents looking for a theme park.

Ponos: Who you callin' a rodent, sister? I'm a bunny!

Panikos: A-And I'm his gopher. [morph into their true forms]

Together: Ta-dah!

Meg: [sighing] I thought I smelled a rat.

Hades: [offscreen] Meg?

Meg: Speak of the devil.

Hades: Meg, my little flower, my little bird, my little nut, Meg. What exactly happened here? I thought you were gonna persuade the river guardian to join my team for the elimination, and here I am, kind of river guardian-less.

Meg: I gave it my best shot, but he made me an offer I had to refuse.

Hades: Fine. So, instead of subtracting two years from your sentence, hey, I'm gonna add two on, okay? Give that your best shot.

Meg: Look, it wasn't my fault. It was this wonderboy, Hercules.

Hades: Can you repeat that name again?

Meg: Hercules. He comes on with this big, innocent farm boy routine, but I could see though that in a Pelponnesian minute.

Hades: So he finally knows who and what he really is. Fortunately for the three of you, we still have time to correct this rather egregious oversight. And this time, no foul-ups.

-

Panikos: "Jeepers, mister"?

Ponos: I was going for innocence.

Panikos: Your nephew has been lured into a trap, my lord.

Hades: A stirring performance, boys. I was really moved. [eating edible worms] And, hey, two thumbs away, way up for our leading lady. What a dish. What a doll.

Meg: Get outta here, you big lug, while you still can.

[after Hydra swallows Hercules]

Hydra: [loud burp].

Meg: [groans] Excuse you.

[Hydra glares at the people]

Iolaus: Now, we're the desserts.

[Hydra is about to eat more then suddenly it stops and it's neck is sliced]

-

[seeing Hydra's countless multiple heads]

Iolaus: Herc, will you forget the decapitating thing? And run!

-

[Hades turns a bright shade of red then destroying his cigar and angrily holding Ponos and Panikos' necks, burning them]

Panikos: Hades mad.

Ponos: Why can't he died? So Hades won't do it to us.

Meg: Well, what do ya know?

-

Hades: [grunting, panting] Pull! [Ponos pulls lever and catapults a vase with Hercules painted on as Hades throws a fireball at it]

Meg: Nice shootin', Rex.

Hades: I can't believe this guy. I throw everything I've got at him, and it doesn't even... [a doorbell rings]

Panikos: Ah, your pizza's here, I'll get it. [showing a pizza box with a picture of Hercules' face on it]

Hades: Is that a picture of Wonderboy's face on that pizza box?

Panikos: I guest it is.

Hades: I've got 24 hours to get rid of this bozo, or the entire scheme I've been setting up for 18 years goes up in smoke, and they have to printed his face on that box!

[Panikos shields his face with a pizza box while Meg hides behind Ponos as Hades explodes]

Meg: [chuckles] Looks like your game's over. Wonderboy is hitting every curve you throw at him.

Hades: Oh, yeah. [Chuckles] I wonder if maybe I haven't been throwing, the right curves at him, Meg, my sweet.

Meg: Don't even go there.

Hades: See, he's gotta have a weakness, because everybody's got a weakness. I mean, for what? Pandora, it was the box thing. For the Trojans, hey. They bet on the wrong horse, okay? We simply need to find out Wonderboy's.

Meg: I've done my part. Get your imps.

Ponos: We couldn't handle him as a baby.

Hades: I need somebody who can handle him as a man.

Meg: Hey, I've sworn off manhandling.

Hades: Well, you know, that's good because that's what got you into this jam in the first place, isn't it? So you sold your soul to me to save your boyfriend's life. And how does this creep thank you? By running off with some babe. He hurt you real bad, didn't he, Meg? Huh?

Meg: Look, I learned by lesson, okay?

Hades: Which is exactly why I got a feelin', you're gonna leap at my new offer. You give me the key to bringing down Wonder Breath, [Panikos passes a vase to Hades then to Meg] and I give you the thing that you crave most in the entire cosmos: [whispers at her ear] your freedom. [she drops the vase]

-

[Iolaus spying on Hades and Meg]

Hades: If I say, "sing", you say, "hey, name that tune" If I say, "I want Wonderboy's head on a platter" you say-

Meg: Medium or well done

Iolaus: Oh! I knew that she was trouble. This is gonna break Herc's heart.

-

Meg: Besides, oh, oneness, you can't beat him. He has no weaknesses, he's gonna...

Hades: I think... he does, Meg. I truly think... he does. [he makes a chain appears around Meg binding her]

Meg: Let me go!

-

Hercules: Ha-ha! Whoo-hoo! [Iolaus walks sad] Hey, Iolaus! What happened to you?

Iolaus: Herc, we gotta talk about your girlfriend.

Hercules: Oh, Iolaus, I just had the greatest day of my life! I-I can't stop thinking about Meg. She's something else.

Iolaus: Herc! I'm tryin' to talk to you! Will you just come down here and listen?

Hercules: Aw, how can I come down there when I'm feeling so up?

-

Iolaus: Listen to me! She's...

Hercules: A dream come true?

Iolaus: Not exactly

Hercules: More beautiful then Aphrodite?

Iolaus: Aside from that!

Hercules: The most wonderful...

Iolaus: She's a fraud!!! She's been playing you for a sap!

Hercules: Aw, come on. Stop kiddin' around.

Iolaus: I'm not kiddin' around.

Hercules: I know you're upset about today, but that's no reason to...

Iolaus: Herc, you're missing the point.

Hercules: The point is - I love her.

Iolaus: But she don't love you.

Hercules: You're just jealous.

Iolaus: She's nothing but a two-timing...

Hercules: Stop it!

Iolaus: no-good, lyin', scheming...

Hercules [hits Iolaus]: Shut up! [Iolaus fells off and hits himself a little] Iolaus, I-- Oh, I'm, I'm sorry.

Iolaus: Okay, okay, that's it. You won't face the truth? Fine.

Hercules: Iolaus, wait. Where you going?

Iolaus: I'm hoppin' the first barge out of here.

Hercules: Fine! G-- Go! I don't-- I don't need you.

-

[Hercules meeting his uncle]

Hades: Baboom. Name is Hades, Lord of the Dead, perhaps you heard of me. Hi. How ya doin'?

-

Hades: Hear me out, okay? So I would be eternally grateful if you would just... take a day off from this hero business of yours. Geez, I mean, monsters, natural disasters. Phew You wait a day, okay?

Hercules: You're out of your mind.

Hades: Not so fast, because, ya see, I do have a little leverage... You might wanna know about. [he snaps fingers and the chained up Megara appears]

Hercules: Meg!

Meg: Wonderboy, don't listen to h... [she is gagged then disappears]

Hercules: Let her go!

Hades: Here's the trade-off. You give up your strength for about 24 hours, okay? Say, the next 24 hours [the chained up Meg appears] and Meg here is free as a bird and safe from harm. We dance, we kiss, we schmooze, we carry on, we go home happy. What d'ya say? Come on.

Hercules: People are, are gonna get hurt, aren't they?

Hades: Nah! I mean, it's, you know, it's a possibility. It happens 'cause, you know, it's war, but what can I tell ya? Anyway, what do you owe these people, huh? [holding Mag's chin] Isn't Meg -- little smoochy face -- isn't she more important than they are?

Hercules: Stop it!

Hades: Isn't she?

Hercules: You gonna swear she'll be safe from any harm Hades: Fine, okay, I'll give you that one. Meg is safe, otherwise you get your strength right back, yadda-yadda, fine print, boilerplate, baboom. Okay? We're done, what d'ya say we shake on it? Hey, I really don't have, like, time to bat this around. I'm kind of on a schedule here, I got plans for August. Okay? I need an answer, like, now. Going once, going twice

Meg: [shook her head, muffed] Please, don't do it for me!

Hercules: All right!

Hades: Yes, we're there! Bam! [They shake hands and Hades takes strength of Hercules]

Meg: [thoughts] No!

Hades: You may feel just a little queasy, it's kinda natural. Maybe you should sit down. [Ponos and Panikos throw a barbell at Hercules, laughing at him] Now you know how it feels to be just like everybody else. isn't it just peachy? Oh! You'll love this. One more thing. [Meg is ungagged] Is Meg not, like, a fabulous little actress?

Meg: Hades, please, don't tell him!

Hercules: What do you mean?

Hades: I mean your little chickie-poo here was working for me all the time. Duh.

Hercules: You... you lied!

Panikos: Or is he? [he and Ponos morph into boys] Help! [coughs]

Ponos: [as boy] Jeepers, mister, you're really strong. [in normal voice] Ha-ha!

Hades: Couldn't have done it without you, sugar, sweetheart, babe.

Ponos and Panikos: Our hero's a zero! Our hero's a zero!

Hades: Well, gotta blaze. There's a while cosmos up there waiting for me with, hey, my name on it. [Meg breaks in tears] So much for the preliminaries, and now on to the main event!

Meg: [the chain that holding her disappears] It's not like that! Wonderboy, I didn't mean to-- I-I couldn't-- I-- I'm so sorry I kept it from you.

Hercules: Iolaus was right about you, and I didn't listen.

Meg: He knows?

[The stars are aligned and the gate to the Titans opens]

Hades: Brothers! Titans! Look at you in your squalid prison! I got a riddle for ya. Who put you down there?

Titans: It was Zeus!

Hades: And now that I set you free, in return you will pledge your legion to me and what is the first thing you are going to do to Zeus?

Titans: Destroy him! [Hades frees the Titans]

Hades: Good answer

Right Lythos: Crush

Left Lythos: Zeus!

Hydros: Freeze Zeus!

Pyros: Melt Zeus!

Stratos: Blow Zeus away!

Titans: Zeus!

Hades: Uh, Guys? You're going the wrong way.

Titans: Huh?

Hades: Olympus would be that way.

Lythoses: Zeus!

Hydrosa: Freeze him!

-

Hercules: [approaches the Cyclops] Here I am!

-

Zeus: Get back, blast you, stinking titan!

[Lythos smashes the gates of Olympus open]

Right Lythos: Zeus!

Left Lythos: We want revenge!

-

[Meg and Pigasos found Iolaus]

Megara: Iolaus, Hercules needs your help!

Iolaus: What does he need me for when he's got friends like you?

Megara: He won't listen to me.

Iolaus: Good! He's finally learned something.

Megara: Look, I know what I did was wrong, but this isn't about me, it's about him. If you don't help him now, Iolaus, he'll die!

[at Olympus]

Zeus: [sees that he's runs out of thunderbolts] Hermes, I need more thunderbolts!

Hermes: Uh, Hephaestus has been captured, my Lord. Everyone's been captured, yah! [Ponos and Panikos grab him]

Ponos: And so are you.

[Pyrosa and Hydrosa make a mountain of ice and fire with Zeus on top.]

Hades: Zeusy, I'm home!

Zeus: Hades, you're the one who freed the Titans!

Hades: You are correct, sir!

-

Megara: You get away from my boyfriend. [fights the Cyclops]

-

Cyclops: [about to kill Meg] Me bite off girl's head! [Hercules burns the Cyclops' face with a burning stick, while Cyclops is yelling, Hercules ties up his legs and Cyclops falls off a cliff. His fall make a quake, from which a pillar starts falling on Hercules]

Megara: Hercules! Look out! [she pushes him out from the pillar's way and is struck by the pillar]

Hercules: Meg! No! Iolaus, help me lift it [Hercules and Iolaus try to raise the pillar, suddenly Hercules getting his strength back] What's happening?

Megara: H-Hades' deal is broken. He promised I wouldn't get hurt.

Hercules: Meg. Why, why did you-- you didn't have to—

Megara: Oh. People always do crazy things... when they're in love.

Hercules: Oh, Meg. Meg, I-- I—

Megara: Are you... always this articulate? You, you haven't got much time. You can still stop Hades.

Iolaus: I'll watch over her.

Hercules: You're gonna be all right. I promise. Let's go Pigasos!

[Olympus: Gods in chains]

Ponos: Hup, two, three, four, come on, everybody! I can't hear you!

Hermes: Oh, oh!

Zeus (being frozen from one side and burnt from another): I swear to you, Hades, when I get out of this--[He is finally buried under molten rock]

Hades: I'm the one giving orders now, brother. And I think I'm gonna like it here.

Hercules: Don't get too comfortable, Hades!

Hades: Hercules!

Ponos: The Cyclops has failed!

Hercules: This oughta even the odds! [He breaks the chain by which the gods were chained]

Panikos: No!

Hermes: [Hitting Ponos and Panikos] Yeah, Hercules! Thank you, man!

-

Panikos: This can't be happening, how can it get any worst? [Pigasos flies in from of them] Uh-oh.

Ponos: Nice horsey! My intentions were pure! I really was attracted to you. [Pigasos bucks them]

Zeus: [to Hepheastus] Throw! [he catches two bolts of lightning] Hah! Now watch your old man work!

Lythoses: Uh-oh. [lightnings explode heads of Lythos, other Titans leave]

Hydros: We're gettin' outta here.

Hades: You cowards!

[Hercules meanwhile catches Stratos and sucks into him, the headless Lythos, Hydros, and Pyros. He launches them into the space where they all explode]

-

Hades: [ranting angrily] We were so close! So close. We tripped the finish line. Why? because our little nut, Meg, has to go all noble. [the room began to shake] Now what?

[The three feel the earth shake, and Cerberus the three-headed dog breaks inside the room, with Hercules standing on top of his middle head holding Ponos and Panikos]

Hercules: (confronting Hades) Where's Megara's soul?

Hades: Oh, look who's here. Wonderboy, you are too much.

Hercules grips Hades: Let her go.

-

Hercules: You like making deals. Take me in Meg's place.

Hades: Oh, well. My hated nephew trapped forever in a river of death.

Hercules: Going once!

Hades: Hmm. Is there a downside to this?

Hercules: Going twice!

Hades: Okay, okay, okay, okay. You get her out - she goes, you stay. [Hercules dives]

Ponos: Oh, you know what slipped Hades' mind? You'll be dead before you can get to her.

Panikos: At least you two will be together there.

Hercules: Hang on, Meg, I'm coming. [Hercules swims, aging rapidly. Atropos goes to cut the thread of life, but it suddenly shines, and the scissors cannot cut it]

Atropos: Oh?

Lachesis: What's the matter with these scissors?

Clotho: The thread won't cut, unless. [At the same time, Hercules floats out from the river with Meg's soul and climbs up the cliff, holding Meg's soul in his arms, as he shines brightly.]

Hades: This is-- this is impossible! You, you, you can't be alive! You'd have to be a, a—

Ponos and Panikos: A god?

[at last, Hercules has re-achieved his immortality]

Hades: Hercules, stop! You can't do this to me. You can't! Herc, Herc, Herc. Can we talk? Y-Your dad, he's a fun guy, right? So maybe you could put in a word with him and he'd kinda blow this whole thing off, you know? Meg, Meg, talk to him, a little schmooze [Hercules hits Hades stronger, and he flies away into the river of death. Souls try to drown him.] No! Let me out!

Panikos: Oh boy, he's gonna be unhappy when he gets outta there.

Ponos: You mean, if he gets outta there.

Panikos: If. If is good for us.

Hades: Taxi! I don't feel so good, I feel a little flushed! [he disappears into the lake-bed]

[outside, Hercules brings the soul of Meg and puts it inside her body]

Megara: Wonderboy, what-- why did you—

Hercules: Huh. People always do crazy things... when they are in love.